Choices

Today I would like to talk about choices.

People ask me all the time how I do it.  How have I lived a life with multiple surgeries, constant pain and challenges and still do what I do each day.  How can I have such an active career and positive attitude.

My answer is choices.  We have choices to make day in and day out.  We chose to get up each day, to go to work, what we eat, if we workout, etc.  There are things that we are presented with in life that we feel are not choices.  Like my physical issues.  I didn't chose to have Legg-Calve Perthes Disease.  But I CAN chose how I deal with it each day.  I can CHOSE if it will run my life, stop me in my tracks, and make me stay in bed all day or I can CHOSE to figure out how to live with it.  How to use it to propel me forward in life.

I still have moments, or days even, where I get depressed and frustrated by things.  But then I remind myself that I am in control.

Yesterday had a number of "hard" moments.  Moments of pain, anger, frustration.  But I decided that my mantra for the day was "I can do hard things" and every time one of those feelings came over me I repeated my mantra in my head.  I CAN do hard things.  I have done hard things.  And this "hard thing" at this very moment will pass and I will get through it.

Knowing that I am in control helps.  I may need help to get out of bed, reach my toothbrush, get food, massage my cramping foot but I am still in control of how I emotionally deal with each of these things.

I have learned very quickly that its alright to ask for help.  In fact people are truly WANTING to help me.  I have learned that my fiance loves me beyond measure as he jumps up at 3 am when I have to use the washroom and through his sleep helps me get out of bed without hesitation.  He is willing and happy to do anything I need.  I have never felt love like this outside of my blood relatives!  It is quite a feeling to know someone is there for you 110%

Getting messages from family, friends and clients is amazing!  The feeling of gratitude and support is overwhelming and I can't put into words how fabulous it feels to know you are all on my side!

Thank-you to each and every one of you who is reading this blog and is sending positive, healing thoughts my way.  You ARE making a difference in my life.  I feel you!!!

Chat with you all again soon.
Briar

Hospital Stay

Well it is done!  Tuesday we arrived at the hospital about 5:45 am.  We went to admitting and signed some forms.  We were then taken upstairs to the Surgical waiting room.  This is where they had me change, take some medication to aid in the recovery process.  

Next we moved into a small little private room where the surgical nurse came to chat, the anesthesiologist, surgical resident who all went over what we were about to do.  

Then I walked into the operating room and was introduced to my team (there was a lot of them).  I lay on the very narrow table that didn't even have room for my arms to be beside me!  They had to attach arm plates.  

The anesthesiologist had quite a hard time getting my IV in place but after a few tries finally got it.  The main surgeon came in and asked if I had any questions.  Then he turned to chat with the two residents that would be assisting him.

I had the ECG leads put on my chest to monitor my heart and mask put on my face and slowly fell asleep.  

The surgery lasted 5 hours with my parents and Reg waiting for me the entire time.

Upon waking in the recovery room I found out that I had lost a lot of blood and they then decided to give me a blood transfusion.  My hemoglobin had dropped to 68 (very low).  

They did a few x-rays at this point by lifting me to place the film under my pelvis.  Quite painful.

My mother came in to do some healing touch therapy.  After about 15 minutes of this I started to have a panic attack (not sure why) but I couldn’t get a breath in and it was very scary.  My nurse (Chris Brown) along with the rest of the team got me settled down with my Mother in the waiting room.

They had me in the recovery room for 4 hours.  After a cardiologist gave the okay they finally moved me up to my room for the night.

My roommate had been in the hospital for a week and was a very sweet woman.  Unfortunately I didn’t get much rest that first night as it was pretty loud.  Tons of people coming and going from the room all night long.

Wednesday was interesting.  I felt very out of it and groggy but able to articulate things a bit better.  They had me sit at the edge of my bed, then use a walker to move a few steps to my left, sit back down and get back into bed.  This was tough as I was very nauseous and light headed.  Later in the day the physiotherapist came back to give me a set of exercises to do daily while in bed.  They were tough but easier than getting up.

Later on Wednesday I did a second round of the sitting, walker, sitting and lying down.

Wednesday night I had my room to myself and got a much better sleep even though they were still coming in every 2-4 hours to give me my meds and check my vitals.

Thursday was a better day.  They took out my catheter very early in the morning and therefore I was forced to get up a number of times throughout the day to use the washroom.  Smart people!  I was getting stronger and feeling a bit better although still very nauseous.

Thursday evening I got another roommate.  So the night was rough again as not only did we have the same issues of multiple nurses coming and going but the patients mother stayed the entire night (as is seems she will do again tonight).

Today I had much more energy, was able to get a lot more food to stay down, did more exercise and was very grateful for the upper body strength that I have!

My hemoglobin levels are still down so they are trying to decide what to do about that but there has been a lot of talk of me going home tomorrow (Saturday).

So that’s the technical update!  

We are currently getting the condo suited up with gadgets to help me at home and I am looking forward to a good nights sleep!!!

Heart Appointments

In the past two weeks I have gone for a number of appointments regarding my heart.  I had updated tests done and have seen a cardiologist as well as the internal medicine department at the hospital.

It has been decided that my heart is strong and fine to move forward with my hip surgery.  Therefore, the surgery will take place as planned on Tuesday.  We still don't have a time but I am supposed to call tomorrow to get that information.

I have spent the past four days getting organized for the next few weeks as well as trying to keep my mind busy so that I don't obsess about the surgery and all the possible outcomes.

I'm sure everything will go well and I will update you from the hospital next week (or have Reg update you all for me!)

Talk to you soon!
B